Here are a choice few:
Examples of proposals we do not accept:
Fastest Welshman to complete Wolfenstein 3D
Most consecutive super fireballs on Street Fighter 2 Turbo by a gay person
Highest score on Boom Boom Rocket by a Scientologist
That’s a tragedy, folks. Because frankly, these are the things I want to know.
Hilarity upon hilarity, kiddies. One of the douches from Jay Louis’ book, Hot Chicks with Douchebags is suing Jay Louis and Simon & Schuster for his appearance in the book. The list of accusations, though, are far more damning than his appearance in the book: couched in the legalese is the sense that even his lawyers think that this guy’s a total douche. Complaints such as:
“Plaintiff has been, and continues to be the subject of ridicule in that he has been, is now, and continues to be called a Douchebag by friends, acquaintances, coworkers, employers and strangers alike.”
Your honor, it sounds like to me that this is a stunning case of if it smells like a douchebag (which is to say, Axe Body Spray), looks like a douchebag, well, Occam’s Razor would have us believe that this motherfucker’s genuinely a douchebag. After all, do you really think a lot of strangers have read Hot Chicks with Douchebags, and remembered his face? Or is it more likely that he’s just a douchebag?
Read more HERE!
Holy nerdom, Batman! I’m thinking I might have to add HBO to my cable package after this news: they’re commissioning a pilot for George R.R. Martin’s A Game of Thrones series. I can’t imagine anything more awesome: imagine a sprawling fantasy TV series in the vein of The Wire! God, I’m practically drooling already. Links HERE and HERE! (The second link is to George R.R. Martin’s livejournal…. something fundamentally hilarious about that.)
In other news, the Nailin’ Palin hit-count spike is over and gone, perhaps not surprisingly, gone the way of Tijuana Bibles the world over, into the realm of pornography collectors and obscene obscurists.
So I just totally rocked the hell out of a homework assignment I thought I was going to fail tonight.
Secondly, we have a way more awesome President now.
Thirdly, in celebration of all this awesomeness, a blast from the kickass past. Two sentence fragments: LASERS. SHOOTING OUT OF GUITARS. The only thing one can say to that is FUCK YEAH.
A lot of rumors were flying around this weekend about Lil Wayne’s supposed assassination or death or whatever. I had my doubts to begin with, and now it’s confirmed: Weezy’s alive and well. Unless this is some kind of crazy reverse Tupac shit. Here’s a reference from Google News. You can get more from them proving that this rumor should be as dead as he’s supposed to be. Thank god. ‘Twould be bad news if it were true.
Here’s the original hoax site. Good fake!
Now this isn’t normally the kind of crap I’d post here, but since it’s the political season, and Tuesday will determine whether or not we as the American people are going to get fucked or not, I’ve done a little bit of web based research, and here’s what y’all get. The first 20 minutes of the next epic porn film, Nailin’ Palin or whatever the title actually is.
The first few minutes are actually kind of hilarious, (according to our two would be Russians, the Kremlin is just Russian for “tow-truck.”) but then as far as I can tell, it’s basically just porn. As such, it’s COMPLETELY NSFW. Watch it here.
Anyhow. Happy Election year, gang.
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